A Question of Faith

*For all those who will read this, don't judge. This is my personal opinion. And I'm entitled to it. If you have anything to say, write it on your own blog. Kthxbai!

I was born a Catholic. And up until now, I still consider myself as one. Maybe I'm not 100% Catholic but it's the religion that works for me the most. I believe most of its teachings and how it has provided me with the faith that I have right now. I have a few things that may or may not follow being a Catholic but I call it, freewill.

This past month have been a grueling, if not, hypocritical for me. I have been juggling my Sundays, my worship days, with 2 religions. I attend the Catholic mass in the morning and then I go to a born-again Sunday worship in the afternoon. Before I did this, I consulted myself, my family (who are ALL Catholics) and God (of course). My reason for doing this is that I was invited by my mother-in-law, who is a (renewed) devotee of the born-again Christian fellowship. The children and I were left in her care by my dear husband when he left for his work abroad. And being a doting daughter-in-law and a "law"-abiding citizen (plus the fact that my faith teaches me to "Honor thy father and mother."), I obliged and followed.

Call me whatever you want to call me. I may do so as well if I had your point-of-view. But I know what I want and I know my own faith. I know what I believe in. As my husband says, everything will fall into their right places SOON. I trust that will happen. The Lord has never given me anything I could not handle. I trust that too.

*** I will probably make another blog post about this when things have changed... or not.

The K-raze!

I have been on hiatus for the past (almost) 2 months simply because, I was addicted. Yes. I was. Probably, still am. Ask me on what? On Kpop! I've been bitten by the kpop bug!

It actually started with a Show Lo chi-drama (yes, chinese!), then I moved on to Marry Me, Mary which I originally saw on local TV. I am naturally an impatient person so I had to buy the DVD with English subs. Some parts simply had incoherent subs so I had to ask around and was directed to a streaming site! Yey! Many thanks to my dear friend, Hyun Shin Yee (not her real name).

Here are pics of the "guys" I follow on Kdrama. I actually think they have similar physical traits with 'ze hubby that's why I like them. Haha.

Hyun Bin
Gong Yoo
Show Lo
Jang Geun Suk

**credit to uploaders

Thank you Hubby!

This post is dedicated to my wonderful husband, who's celebrating his 32nd birthday this Friday, July 8, and whom we dearly miss. He's abroad working, to bring food to our table.

I have always thought of going back to work. I still actually have that feeling of my need for work. But I am THANKFUL that my husband is as responsible as he is and is doing his best to provide for us. I seriously don't have to work. We have enough. Not much, just enough. And I am blessed to be able to spend my days and nights with my babies. And no matter how much I go crazy at times because I miss the hubby so much, I am still at that state where I'm content and happy.

I love you By! I'll forever be grateful for what you have given us.. me..

Happy 32nd birthday!

"Here Without You"

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight it's only you and me

The miles just keep rollin'
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me

Everything I know, and anywhere I go
It gets hard but it wont take away my love
And when the last one falls
When it's all said and done
It gets hard but it wont take away my love

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl its only you and me

Revived!

I have been a hermit!

I missed blogging. Internet was down for a few days and I have been really busy with momhood. But now I'm back! And I hope this one's for good. (regular updates, please)

So, what has happened? Let me tell you a quick view... first, was my eldest son's 9th birthday. Oh, that was a busy day, err, week! MIL and I cooked and prepped food for his classmates and teachers on the day of his birthday. Then I prepped for another party that was held here at our house Saturday of that week. I was here and there afterwards. Now, its the fourth of July and it's a hurray day for me, considering I've got most bases covered now. Bills and all. I just need to find myself a good project this month so I can help out in payments and of course, buy myself a really nice gift. Just because.

Hope to see you guys here soon!

Today's Gospel

I got this email because I'm subscribed to Bo Sanchez's website :

ANYTHING BUT THAT

“But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you…” – Matthew 5:44

I was very angry with somebody. No… the word angry is mild. I was livid.

I had a mixture of emotions about something that transpired, and my human instinct told me that I needed to strike back to defend myself. But it was something I knew I didn’t want to do. Instead, I lashed out at another person involved and said all the hurtful words I could say. The sleeping monster inside me awoke.

I carried this anger in my heart for many years. And each time I came across the chosen verse above, I would always cringe. Love my enemies? Pray for those who persecute me?... “Lord! Please make me do anything but that!”

To this day that remains a tall order for me. It is not easy. I prayed for the blessing of time, believing that it heals all wounds, and that in God’s perfect time the anger in my heart will fade.

True enough, the time came. It felt as if a big thorn in my heart was pulled out. Only then did I actually know what it’s like to forgive — the peace of Christ enveloped me and renewed my spirit.

May His peace fill your heart every day. Nova Arias (nova.svp@gmail.com)

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REFLECTION:

Was there ever a time when you loved your enemy? If you managed to do it once, you can do it over and over again.

Grant me a change of heart, O Lord

This struck me hard as it was so close to what I felt recently. Very similar. And I am very thankful that I have been free from this tragedy. Now, although I may still hold grudge on some people, the feeling is not as bad as it was last year. The cliche goes that, time heals all wounds, and I know it would. God has never given up on me and never left me. Who would've thought I would come to a point where I am deeply humbled by my experiences and it has taught me a lot about myself and others. I continue to pray that I will always be reminded of how lucky I am to have been forgiven and receive forgiveness.

What I have now...

Got a mail regarding a comment in one of my old blogs. So I started to read. I was a really unhappy, depressed, whiny woman! That was 5 years ago. I think I still am, though, but in a mature kinda way (that, I'd like to think!).

I was really sad. I can't help but pity the person I was. I was constantly looking for things from different areas in my life. I only had 1 child then. Maybe the kids brought more "life" to me, more optimism. Come to think of it, I think I have more patience, more time, more humility, more "ground".. I'm more like what I need to be.

I guess it was the pressure. It was the environment, the people around me. Actually, things started to get really bad after that. Then it was okay again. Then bad again. Okay, bad, okay, bad. It's okay now though. And I seriously hope it stays this way. Although there are missing "parts" of me now (hubby being away and all), I still consider this time as one of the "better" days.

See yah.

Satan’s Letter … a memoir of days…

Hey you,

I saw you yesterday as you began your daily chores. You awoke without kneeling to pray. As a matter of fact, you didn’t even bless your meals or pray before going to bed last night. You are so ungrateful. I like that about you. I cannot tell you how glad I am that you have not changed your way of living.

Fool, you are mine. Remember that you and I have been going steady for years and I still don’t love you yet. As a matter of fact, I hate you because I hate God. I am only using you to get even with God. He kicked me out of heaven and I am going to use you as long as possible to pay him back.

You see, Fool, GOD LOVES YOU, and He has great plans in store for you. But you have yielded your life to me, and I’m going to make your life a living hell. That way, we’ll be together twice. This will really hurt God. Thanks to you. I’m really showing Him who’s boss in your life. With all of the good times we’ve had… We have been watching dirty movies, cursing people out, partying, stealing, lying, hypocriting, fornicating, overeating, telling dirty jokes, gossiping, backstabbing people, disrespecting others and those in leadership, NO respect for the Church, bad attitude: SURELY you don’t want to give this all up.

Come on Fool, let’s burn together forever. I’ve got some hot plans for us. This is just a letter of appreciation from me to you. I’d like to say THANKS for letting me use you for most of your foolish life. You are so gullible. I laugh at you. When you are tempted to sin, you give in… HA HA HA, you make me sick.

Sin is beginning to take its toll on your life. You look 20 years older, I need new blood. So go ahead and teach children how to sin. All you have to do is, smoke, drink alcohol, cheat, curse, gamble, gossip, fornicate, and do all things bad. Do all of this in the presence of children and they will do it too. Kids are like that.

Well, Fool, I have to let you go for now. I’ll be back in a couple of seconds to tempt you again. If you were smart, you would run somewhere, confess your sins, live for God with what little bit of life that you have left. It’s not my nature to warn anyone, but to be your age and still sinning, it’s becoming a bit ridiculous. Don’t get me wrong, I still hate you… IT’S JUST THAT YOU’D MAKE A BETTER FOOL FOR CHRIST.

SATAN

P.S. And if you really love me, you won’t share this letter with anyone.

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